Thursday, March 01, 2018

Partial List of Hope Hicks's White House Duties

White lies
 
Little fibs
 
Harmless prevarications
 
Genteel fictions
 
Telling the truth mainly, but stretchin' it some
 
Artful misdirection
 
Poetic license
 
Flights of whimsy
 
Pursuing a less literal, more memoir-centered notion of "truth"
 
Yarns
 
Tall tales
 
Fish stories
 
Off-the-record briefings
 
Keeping our oral folklore traditions alive
 
Commiserating

Diplomatic balderdash
 
Stimulating the hearer's sense of wonder
 
Telling all the truth but telling it slant
 
Telling some of the truth, slantier
 
Slanting, baby, slanting
 
Strategic omissions

Misleading paraphrases

Verbal legerdemain 

Sympathetic nodding
 
Thrilling campfire tales
 
Press relations
 
Having the courage to describe the world as we wish it to be
 
Accessorizing properly for fall colors

Explaining how Santa can be in so many places at the same time
 
Seemingly accidental misrepresentations
 
Making soothing noises
 
Pulling Maggie Haberman's leg, just as a little joke

Sharing staff diet tips

Deliberately misunderstanding
 
Stone cold lying, bitch.

cross-posted from Dagblog: please comment there, not here


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